Couple-time after the baby

He's asleep! Delta force: Go go go!
He’s asleep! Delta force: Go go go!

If you have a baby and still want to do date/couple things with your spouse, you need planning and opportunism.

When the baby is awake, you’re generally going to want to spend time with him. Especially if you work in an office away from home, the time you have with him is pretty precious.

However, you and your wife will still want to do adult things that babies cannot participate in. Some examples:

  • Baking something complex
  • Playing a co-op video game
  • God forbid, actually having sex

The natural time to do such things is when the baby is asleep. However, how many of you just waste the precious nap-time duration just laying around playing with your phone? Yep, guilty as charged. The antidote to this is planning and opportunism.

The first step is planning, and all this entails is keeping in mind a few things you’d like to do together with your spouse over the next few days. Yeah – it’s lame to plan. I get it. Spontaneity is way better. However, even lamer than planning is not-doing-anything. I think some planning is just required now…

The second step is opportunism. Once the baby goes down for a long nap (based on his daily routine and patterns), you and your spouse should waste no time, and jump into action.

Now don’t take me too literally – I’m not saying you must have planned activities all the time, nor am I saying that you must do couple things right every time the baby falls asleep. And obviously it’s still cool to lay around and play with your phone – it’s a great way to relax.

But if you’re finding you have no time for couple time, this is one strategy Mary and I have used sometimes to get our date-time achievement.

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